Alright, listen up, you young’uns! Today, this old gal gonna tell you somethin’ ’bout this here Elden Ring game. My grandson, he plays it all day long, yellin’ at the screen. Says it’s important to pick the right “class” when you start. Sounds like school to me, but what do I know?
So, this Elden Ring thing, it’s got these… these “stats.” Like how strong you are, how fast you are, that kinda thing. And when you start, you gotta pick a class, and that decides what you’re good at. Makes sense, I guess. Like how I’m good at makin’ pies, but not so good at… well, you know, runnin’ a marathon.
This one class, the Samurai, they say it’s good for beginners. Beginners! Like babies learnin’ to walk. This Samurai, he’s got good gear, like a good pair of overalls, and he can use a bow and arrow. And he’s got good… numbers. High numbers are good, I reckon. Like a good harvest. Lots of potatoes, that’s good numbers.
- Samurai – Good for startin’ out.
- Got good stuff.
- Can use a bow.
- Good numbers – like a good, full barn!
Then there’s this other one, the Vagabond. Sounds like a hobo to me, but they say he’s good all around. Like a good mule, can do a bit of everything. He’s strong, that’s for sure. Strong like an ox. And he’s quick, too. But if you want him to do magic, you gotta work on his… his smarts. And his… faith? What’s faith got to do with it? I pray every day, don’t mean I can shoot fireballs.
- Vagabond – Strong like my old rooster, used to be.
- Quick, too.
- Gotta work on his brain if you want magic.
Now, there is a class, they call it the Wretch. Sounds pretty bad, don’t it? And it is. Hardest one, they say. But! If you work hard, like we did back in my day, then it can be good. Like turnin’ bad land into good. Takes time, takes sweat, but you can do it. This class got no armor. Just like them old days, when you made your own clothes.
They say these starting classes, they don’t matter much in the long run. Just like, you know, it don’t matter if you started with a hoe or a plow, long as you get the field planted. But at the beginning, it matters. Like choosin’ the right seeds. You pick the wrong seeds, you get nothin’ but weeds. This Elden Ring got 8 stats, I heard. Like different kinds of seeds, I guess.
- Vigor – That’s like how much you can get hit, like how sturdy your fence is.
- Mind – That’s for magic, like knowin’ when to plant your crops.
- Endurance – That’s how long you can work, like me, I can work all day.
- Strength – How strong you are, can you lift that heavy log?
- Dexterity – That’s how good you are with your hands, like knittin’ or milkin’ a cow.
- Intelligence – That’s book smarts, like knowin’ how to read.
- Faith – That’s… well, I don’t know what that is in this game. Prayin’, maybe?
- Arcane – That’s like… witch stuff. Don’t know much about that.
They got 10 of these startin’ classes, they say. Somethin’ for everyone. Like a potluck. You got your fighters, your mages, your archers. Just like in my day, you had your blacksmith, your farmer, your… well, you get the picture.
So, if you start with these magic things low, you gonna be more physical. Like using your hands, not some fancy spell. Makes sense. If you don’t study magic, you ain’t gonna be a magician. You’re gonna be swingin’ a sword or somethin’.
This Elden Ring, it’s got all these classes, and these stats. It’s like life, I guess. You gotta choose what you’re gonna be good at. You can’t be good at everything. Unless you’re… well, unless you’re me, of course. I’m good at everything.
So, you pick your class based on what you wanna do. You wanna hit things real hard? Pick one with high Strength. You wanna use magic? Pick one with high Intelligence or Mind or somethin’. It’s all common sense, really. Just like farmin’. You gotta know what you’re plantin’ if you want a good harvest. And if you want to know more about them Elden Ring class starting stats, you ask your momma, not me. My eyes hurt after all this talking.
But remember what this old lady told ya. Pickin’ the right class is like pickin’ the right seeds. You gotta know what you want to grow. Or you end up with a field full of weeds, or a game full of death. And ain’t nobody got time for that.
I think I am done with this here Elden Ring thing. But this old lady learned a thing or two, I reckon. Just by listenin’ to my grandson yell at that screen. Now I think I will go outside, the sun is shining today. Maybe I’ll do some gardening. Got to keep those skills sharp, you know!
